Scripture

1 Corinthians 13:4-8a "Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

Hebrews 13:4 "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure."

Message

Marriage is a covenant blessed by God. We need to hold it in high esteem, as He does. If we did we would do all that we can to love and value our spouse and to preserve the unity and love of the home and the marriage. We would obey His command to not divorce, but to lay down our lives for the sake of our husband or wife. Marriage is an earthly example of God's love for us. He is faithful to us and does not divorce us.

Unfortunately, we are easily hurt and our expectations for our spouse and life together fall short of what we dreamed in most cases. It is because we base this hope on a false reality. We forget that we both are imperfect creatures and both in the need of grace and forgiveness on a daily basis. We need God's help to have a good marriage. He carefully outlines in Scripture how to have a successful marriage. We are to submit to one another in love and not esteem ourselves above the other. We are to be kind and tenderhearted, forgiving each other. Men are told to love their wives as Christ loves the church and He laid His life down for His Bride. The wife is told to respect her husband and submit to him. This does not mean the woman has lesser value than the man. It is just the way God has set things up and if we obey His plan things naturally run smoother. He has designed us as man and woman and it is He who instituted marriage in the first place. Too many times when couples are unhappy their answer is divorce. This is not God's answer. And if we follow through with this without legitimate godly reasons for divorce, we are in SIN. We create a greater problem! (God approves divorce if there is adultery and the offended is not able to forgive. Forgiveness and restoration should be the primary goal. God also allows divorce if the unbelieving spouse no longer wants to live with the believer. In cases of abuse, God allows separation.)

The Lord wants to do a miracle in your marriage.! He wants to do a miracle in each of your lives! He wants us to grow in our relationship with Him and He uses marriage (unhappy or not) to achieve this goal. We need to submit to Him and with a joyful attitude let Him be the Lord in our lives and let Him direct our path. We need to have God's perspective and be willing to sacrifice what we think is best for ourselves and obey God and put the needs of our partner first. God says He HATES divorce! We need to hate it and not look at it as a way out, a way to improve things. It does not.

We may be tempted to say, "I have fallen out of love with you!" Love is a verb. It is an act and not a feeling. If we will initiate love and respond in love, the "love feelings" will follow. As we obey the Lord, He will bless us and enable us to put both Him and our husband/wife first.

Seek the Lord! Commit yourself to His ways. Let Him do great things in your marriage!!

Prayer

Dear Lord, You know how very difficult this marriage is for me at times. You know how hurt I have been and how unhappy I am. It seems to never get better. I know you hate divorce and I want to love what you love and hate what you hate. I am tempted to free myself from this pain through divorce, but please Lord change my heart and work a miracle in our relationship. Lord, please give me your love for my husband/wife. He/She is so unlovable at times and I know I can be too. I need to see them as you see them, through your eyes, in all their need and hurts. Help me to give him/her grace and to love him/her through the difficulties in their life. Help me Lord to put the needs of my husband/wife first and let you take care of my needs. Please work in our marriage and make it strong so we can in turn help others. Thank you that You are always faithful; please make me a faithful person. Help me to not give up but to keep doing my best and wait for the wonderful things you are going to accomplish. In Jesus' name, Amen.